I am the purple hyacinth
I am the terror
I am the forgotten
I am the remembered
I am the song
I am the breath
I am the struggle
I am the air
I am the rainbow
I am the waves
I am the whisper
and I am forgiven.
I am the purple hyacinth
I am the terror
I am the forgotten
I am the remembered
I am the song
I am the breath
I am the struggle
I am the air
I am the rainbow
I am the waves
I am the whisper
and I am forgiven.
Thank you Mother
thank you Father
thank you sisters, brothers
thank you for teaching me
to love myself with gentle kindness
thank you for teaching me
to set healthy boundaries.
Thank you for showing up
when I could not.
For a bit without wit, the murky stench of unworthiness crept through and then dissipated as the mayflies fill the sky and then die.
—————-
Benevolent Beings, be with me as I brave the cavers encasing the waters of filth and murk. As I trek through the sludge and find gems throughout. May the gems be one with the muck and not be established as better or worse. May I know that the muck is the same as the flower. Even the poisons make way for beauty as if beauty were better than the poison. The poisonous bliss of eternity flickers in the night forthright coming through and through. May the sadness illustrate the gladness through a filter of madness.
And so it is.
This writing comes after a day of fearfully consuming material possessions so that loved ones might feel welcome. And at the exit of the opulence, there sits a man pleading for life. Ignored and then I turn back to offer him a bottle of sparkling Perrier and 20 bucks. The tears flowed as I recognized him as my brother and my son and that those that plead for life are but a reflection of us all. The malnourished parts of us torched by the elements.
This writing comes after the tales of blessings shared. Of being mutilated by an industry created and creating fear through the promise of healing. The poison that promises those who have brought illness into their lives but then seek love as they decide to live. To live out of fear of creating an atmosphere where loved ones not longer feel welcome.
Why are we tolerant and nice to those that are most cruel?
The answer that comes flowing through: Because, sometimes, we feel what others feel. And as a survival tactic, we do not want to feel more pain and sadness than we already do. Fearing further abandonment from the safety and love of which we are worthy might completely paralyze us.
Instead, take action to know the truth. Take action to halt the cruelty for the action is acute and the sadness is imaginary.
Most likely the cruel someone, is unable to feel compassion or any kind of sadness for what they inflict upon others. Embrace the long term and know that is where the safety and love is given and received by all.
The space exists, all you have to do is move into it.
The concept of moving into existing empty spaces came up several times this week. The first time was during a conversation regarding the houseless. “There are so many empty homes. Why are there so many homeless people?” I responded with, “They are not open to receiving.”
Which has been true in my life over and over and over again.
The other instance was with open office space. Recently the company I work for combined with another company and for a few months, the people from one location have been crammed together in a space much less desirable from a lighting and physical comfort perspective than the other floors. An observation was that the people in the smaller quarters have built up a cheerful comaraderie. Working diligently as needed but also taking time to laugh and share stories of both sorrow and joy. There is a group that gathers consistently for lunch almost every day. And as the moving days come closer, we all look at one another and say, “I hope we can continue this.” And we will.
With regard to moving into the existing space. The lighting is calmer, the views are beautiful, the conference rooms abundant and the decor pleasing in the other spaces. There are welcoming new neighbors and an expansive space with which to grow and create.
The space is there. Move into it. And take with you the creative energy to receive that which you are worthy.
— Wendy Who Walks With Wildflowers
A personal update and an important part of a grounded view on this journey of a Person Thriving and Surviving Daily.
Recently, the universe aligned in such a way to allow me to relocate. The important part is that I received the gift. To know I am loved and to know that I am worthy of setting myself free has been of utmost brilliance. Not brilliant as in genius mind but of brilliant light of loving kindness.
I heard the words, “think of yourself” mixed with other words of encouragement. I then checked in with myself and my life companion on a job relocation opportunity. “Yes” was the resounding response and “Why would you not do this?”
The drain was then unclogged and everything flowed freely for the first time in many years. Stagnant no more, I find creativity in every moment.
Creativity as in creating a life of loving kindness. Creating a life of thriving.
And thus, I share and teach that which is genuine truth in overcoming a life started in trauma. I life built upon a traumatic experience is now a life of undefined moments of gratitude prompted by the essence of angels on earth.
At one point someone told me to come back into my body. I did and on a time continuum, it has taken years but here a now it is simply what is. There are things we need to do as humans to survive with the basics – work to provide financial resources to in turn provide our bodies with that which allows us to know we are safe so that we may create, nourish, love, communicate, intuit and express the ultimate version of ourselves.
The relocation is also a transition is also a deployment. The mission is to experience life free of constant deflection and self-protection from the toxic environment in which I barely existed for decades.
Some might say I was fine. I wasn’t fine. Maybe a sarcastic “fine.” Some might say I was bitchy and angry all the time. Yes, I was. Some might say I was sad. Yes, I was sad. Some might say I was not living life to my full potential. Totally true.
But now, I look forward to experiencing a bit more of my true potential. Being “fine” as in, “you are lookin’ fine, girl!”, joyful, kind and loving. I’ll keep the pixie-like quality of being a big ornery at times. I turn on the confidence more often and the go-get-it. I turn on the humor. I turn on the dance. I turn on the compassion. And I turn on the kindness. I also turn on the “I’m in charge of myself” a bit more by communicating clearly what I need in order to do my life’s work.
To all of you out there that are feeling angry, lost, sad, rejected, hopeless and low-vibration please know that to persevere with integrity and self love is worth it. Not for the reward but to experience life as a person who will confidently do what needs to be done to thrive.
Thank you. I love you.
There once was a girl who stood with the pony
at the water’s edge looking forlorn and gloomy
And on the pony’s back appeared an angel saying,
“I’ve been with you your entire life”
and “I was there to protect you when you were small”
The girl looked down at the water and saw her reflection,
in the water now calm and clear
She saw herself riding a stallion, tall and proud
holding the staff of a warrior
and on her back were the angel’s wings
And so it is.
Much of the writing shared here comes from me showing up each day to write what needs to be written. I’m not sure where it comes from some days but it always feels good to share so here are today’s words of loving kindness.
Have you ever heard or read the phrase, “Your thoughts create your reality”? Well, what if I were to tell you that your thoughts DO NO create your reality? That belief or trendy philosophy could be completely false and the cause of much struggle and suffering. Thoughts shift only perception of existence.
See, there is a reason why nothing seems to be working the way people want it to work out sometimes.
You are capable and worthy of a kind and gentle existence. Therefore here come words of assistance if you choose to receive them.
Move low vibration to high vibration and that which feels peaceful and good just like one would do with the ho’oponopono prayer. When you move from low vibration to high vibration you align with source. And the source is YOU for you are one with the universe. This concept is truth. Always has been and always will be (for now anyway 🙂
Low vibration: thoughts = reality
High vibration: present = kindness
When you are stuck in a rut, you reside in a paradigm where thoughts create reality. You are not free or aligned. Trauma then dictates. But when you, as the light being that you are, has your illumination sparked and fueled then the traumatic even either never happens or is immediately forgiven or it is reflected back upon the source from which it came and is recycled into a high vibration. And, since you are the source, it is you that recycles the situation into a high vibration. This happens so quickly that you don’t even know it is happening.
This is called magical resonance.
Embrace magical resonance and automatically there is no need to constantly chant or meditate or fix or mourn or try so hard. Magical resonance releases you from creating altars and grids. Everything and everyone is already an altar and a crystal grid. That is a knowing and a recall, available to you. You are your own source. This is magical resonance.
Know it. Recall it. Fly. Be. Breathe. And so it is.
One more message re: misinterpretations.
Misinterpretations are of the mind. Go with feelings or muscle testing for truth. Go not with “signs” for the mind interprets signs to benefit the support of untruths. Much like fearful research is designed to support a theory. True research goes for disproving the theory. But some, if created in fear will only support the fear and the cycle then spirals into a low vibration. If you are in alignment with source, there would not be a need for research. Just think of all the wonderful creativity and light this brings forth in you and around you!
Thank you. I love you.
— Wendy Who Walks With Wildflowers