“love”

Blooming

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

Invisible with the strength of the unknown
Carried like a child, tender, ungrown
Loved like a daisy in the sunshine in the spring
Tortured no longer under the weight
Let go
Embraced like a dollie given on Christmas day
Forgiven like a cherished wrong
We don’t know what blooms inside us
Until we let go, the get of hell on earth
And learn to laugh once again
Like the tired and delirious told to sleep
when the sun still shines
and the sweetness of the day lingers
like the taste of honey

Be strong in the attempts to bloom
It’s all worth it. Do it. Aho.

— Wendy Who Walks with Wildflowers

Safety

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

In the earth or in the trees in the sky I don’t know why
Hold me gently me oh my
Cradle me soothe me give me lullabies
In the middle of the day or in the middle of the night
There the comfort lets me know there is only us
Let the others go.

Greeting Grief

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

I greet grief with a love deep and strong. One moment at a time in the infinite wisdom that lies within. Be not afraid, I hear whispered in the quiet of the night. Busy myself no longer as the peace that dwells on the mountain tops rains down on me like a gentle spring carrying melted snow. Long ago there must have been a time when we all loved one another and in this moment we embrace and greet that love, acknowledging the grief that resides in our hearts like a welcome guest who gently rocks us as we view the stars. Be gentle. Be kind. Be strong. Be at peace. For there are and always will be the joyful twinkling chimes that play for us near and far.

Twinkling

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

Twinkling above
see below
the comfort arises never too low
far away the twilight stays
forever tomorrow until she dies

Around her the small ones,
the dear ones
they all gather
wondering why she does not share
the endearing love that she holds
down in the deepness so dark and tranquil

There is no more sadness
but only gladness

— Wendy Who Walks with Wildflowers

Turning Disaster into Laughter

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

I’ve been given homework assignment from the leader of a Writing for Healing session — How can I turn disaster into laughter. I tend to have a serious and morose affect. But I am capable of laughter, especially when it comes to animals. I was on a call with several of my siblings and my brother’s puppy, Buddy, was doing his puppy growl and I started giggling. There was no disaster to turn into laughter unless of course you consider us talking about an upcoming celebration of life event coming up where all of us plan to attend but none of us are looking forward to. The disaster isn’t the celebration of life, it’s the sudden transition of our father who died very suddenly after falling on the sidewalk while walking his dog, Bitte. I had spoken with him a few days prior and he mentioned how he had been feeling dizzy lately. I encouraged him to take it easy and told him I loved him.

I mention our conversation because there is a sense of guilt surrounding his fall. It’s an ego thing, to think that I could have done something to prevent the fall or whatever happened in his body to cause the fall. I suppose all of us kids have thought the same thing: what if I had visited more often? Would the visits keep him alive. Not likely.

But still, I so very much enjoyed visits with Dad before he and his wife bullied my son when he was going through a rough time in his life. The words and actions completely broke my son. I will never understand what they were thinking. Why would very harsh words and actions get a young man to snap out of his depression, loneliness and low self-esteem? It broke my heart as well because my dad and his wife used to care so much for my son and they got along so well for 30+ years. The harsh words and actions are disaster that I have failed to turn into laughter. The only laughter is when I spend time with my son. Perhaps there was something in their harsh words that catapulted the situation into a positive one … but they completely demolished their relationship.

Relationships within my family have always been interesting. As are all relationships. Currently, we’ve all been a bit closer since my dad transitioned. I especially enjoy observing how one sibling in particular has decided to communicate with several others after years and years. We grew up with a mother who constantly pitted us against each other which I have read is one sign of narcissism. I recall a conversation years ago where I finally got sick of it and said to her, “You have to stop eating people alive.” Her comments were relentless up to that point. They subsided for a while until she felt that saying negative things about a couple of people constantly would get her what she needed. It never worked, I told her again to stop and that I would not listen to it or read it.

And now that she seems to have stopped eating people alive, the laughter has bubbled up in happy conversations with my siblings. I remember my dad telling me, “I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.” Protect me from what? Men raping me? Mother eating all of us alive with her backstabbing and lying and pitting us against one another? Maybe all of the above and more. Dad’s transition has shifted the mother-child dynamic

If this were a stand-up routine. I could spin stories to get a laugh or two but that would be eating my mother alive, and I do not want to do that. Occasionally, several of us siblings will talk about things that make us laugh. We turn disaster into laughter more often than we think.

Speaking of thinking: I’ve been thinking a lot lately about living with systemic sclerosis and how living with it has been a gift in many ways. The biggest gift: setting boundaries. Throughout most of my life, I was what one could call a doormat. I said yes to just about everything. I would say things like “bring it on, I can handle it.” Everything from doctors treating me poorly to health scares to men raping me to animals making my life miserable to neighbors making my life miserable to employers making my life miserable. I take that all back – none of them “made” my life miserable. They were just being themselves, it was me making myself miserable because I did not know how to create boundaries.

The most recent boundary is not giving money to the Scleroderma Foundation for their annual walk fundraiser. Years ago I would have given them lots of money and volunteered and did whatever I could. But today it makes much more sense for the organization to give ME money. Take the money from the rich and powerful who have much more than they need. I am currently living on less then $10,000 per year which is way below the poverty line.

I’ve learned that my income is just a number. I, in fact, live like a billionaire – or what I would imagine I would live like if I was a billionaire. I have what I need and am able to sleep in and do things I like to do. What do I like to do? Write, walk with Ellie, watch documentaries and films, read and listen to music and podcasts. I also like to meditate, practice qigong, practice yoga and attend free sessions for healing. I also enjoy learning. None of those things require much money.

Having very little income could be viewed as a disaster but I’ve turned it into laughter and joy by releasing the encultured lies our society has conjured up – much like the news turning just about everything into a disaster. Or perhaps not a disaster, but drama designed to trigger chemical imbalances that drive capitalism in favor of the elite.

The Iron Door of Confusion

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

Between the layers

lies a collective confusion

about why we’re stuck

in a place where we know

to go

up or down.

Behind the iron door

in a space where there is no place

for joy or terror

in a place where we know

we should go

up or down.

Where the walls replaced

the once brilliant views

where there were no walls

there are now caverns of confusion

in a place where we know

to go up or down.

We move, we follow,

we express our sorrow.

But what do we do?

We pry open the iron door where we know

to go

up or down.

Laughter subsides

and we all arise

awakened to the choices

awakened by the voices

of the children  playing

and the trees are swaying

away from the collusion

and much confusion

form the place where we know

to go

neither up nor down.

— Wendy Who Walks With Wildflowers

I am here to hold your hand.

~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

“I am here to hold your hand. I want to be with you as you travel this journey, take you by the hand as a very small child and lead to you safety,” my grandfather said to me.

Before we continue, I want to express thank you for spending your time reading this post.

As I mentioned in “The Veil is Thin” post, I am getting to know my paternal grandfather for the first time in 55 years. He’s in spirit. I am with spirit so we communicate quite well. I feel loved and transformed. Someone told me to be grateful. And I am always, it’s just that only love and sadness exist for me. So gratitude resides within love. It’s a given.

The first evening after I was introduced to Super G, he laid the ground work and shared a bit more of his wisdom and perhaps a warm up for what was to come. I chose the name Super G because I don’t know his name. My father’s adoption papers and birth certificate do not name his birth father. But he showed me a cape and has a sense of humor and loves to protect so I call him Super G.

Here is a summary of a channeled message the day after our introduction:

Super G here . . . . aha! I love you so much. I remind you that we went back together to all the moments when you were not loved the way you should have been loved. I hold your hand and together we walk away, saying, “no thank you, I am worth more than what you are offering this moment. I am worth all the gold in Spain.” We go to a safe place where you are loved by all the angels of the multidimensional universe sprinkled with fairy dust. You are my sweet love. You are a princess worthy of the most comfortable, beautiful, delicious and joyful. Many birds flying all around you today, did you see them? They are curious as to why you did not open the door, they would have come in to sing to you. sweet caroling. boom boom boom.. hahahahaha. Just like that, they would sing to you. with kindness and love. For the wisdom of the ages is more than likely the answers to everything you ask.

When there is exponential light in the universe, it is also in equal measures with darkness but the darkness is not the evil those speak of. The darkness is simply a balance of the energy of light. Like the winter balances the summer. It is simply a time to recharge your batteries. Look to darkness by closing your eyes and knowing the truth. Much etheric wonder takes place in the darkness.

You are illuminating others with your brilliance. and when they reflect that brilliance back, it is an affirmation of your true purpose and you are living your true purpose.

Round and round you went in circles and the circles are love are love are love. Around the circles and then step outside them to spread your wings for you are no longer contained in the circle of love and light. You radiate like the beautiful illustration of the tree of light. Yes the tree of light. That is you my sweetness. And I am the grandfather of the light for I am the grandfather of you. I go beyond the light and am the essence of that which you are not able to see or imagine but simply be with it, just as you would with the subtle sensation of floating in the ocean on a beautiful sunny and calm day. The bliss of the abyss. the strength of the strong song song song song song … there we gooooooo! Take it nice and slow.

And that’s the way it goes sometimes, only Super G is much more fluent and expressive than my other spirit guides. It’s fun and exhausting at the same time. I place boundaries around the amount of time I sit at the keyboard and when the messages come through. It is only with my permission and my request. There are other ways of communicating, like the color of vehicles. Turns out that all red vehicles are signs of protection. This is new to me because previously I had interpreted red vehicles as a warning. Protection is much nicer!

Protection is much nicer. Don’t you agree? I’ve been working on feeling safe my entire life. A fleeting feeling that I gave up on at times. I feel safe now. Just like I always do when I am in the presence of my oldest son. When I am with him, it seems the world could crumble and everything would be ok in our little bubble of safety.

Safety is important when connecting with spirit guides. Just because a spirit wants to be your guide does not mean that you have to accept the guidance or invitation for it is completely a choice. The guidance of Super G, my grandfather, is very welcome and we are having fun! It’s not like I sit around at a table and we have tea together and chat about stuff. I spend a few minutes at a time typing or writing down the messages that come through. All I do is connect and let the messages flow.

Flow! Wow. I am at a time in my life where I am able to instantly manifest for the greatest good. I wondered why it was happening for me and a friend said, “Because it’s coming from your heart.” That makes me cry every time. I am so grateful.

Grateful for all the instant healing that is going on with the help of my spirit grandfather. The message was that he would hold my hand as a child and walk away from situations that were not kind and loving.

First hand-holding experience and correction was going back to the time when I was four or five years old. A visit to the doctor was in order either for an illness or school exam. My mom was in the waiting room with my little sisters. While in the room alone with the doctor, he touched me in ways no one should ever touch another.

I’ve worked on this experience before. Tried to change the effects. Tried to rid my cells of the debris. Tried to change the perception. Once I visualized burning all the records so that I was never a patient. I tried to change the rules so that the man never became a doctor. Nothing worked, I still held on to the effects. I realize why. I do not have control over what happens to others for it is their path and their life journey. I can only effect my own experience. Either interpret it differently or choose a different path.

This time, I choose a different path. A high frequency, loving path. And with my spirit grandfather, we changed the energetic vibration of the essence of being.

I choose to allow only loving, kind and gentle medical professionals and men into my life. Men specifically for many reasons. Some obvious here.

With the energy shift, comes profound healing. I now know only loving kindness at the hands of medical professionals and men. Do you know how that changes my ENTIRE LIFE? DO YOU?

Here’s a list to start it off.

  1. Confidence in myself that what I communicate will be honored
  2. My body heals quickly with the onset of an illness or injury. So instead of attacking me, my cells are strong and have a force that prevents illness or repairs damaged cells.
  3. My body has a strong immune system that changes the energy of the germs before they can become harmful
  4. Trust that I belong on this earth
  5. The physical manifestation of love is radiance and wellness
  6. The emotional manifestation of love is joy
  7. I approach medical professionals and men as equals

The list above expands. Use your imagination. I could go on and on with a list of at least 1,000 more items. The comprehension of knowing love as a small child has an exponential effect. The creation of reality is now an essence of safety, belonging, strength and love.

The strength, safety and love I could not have realized until I opened my heart to receive love. And reach out to hold the hand of my spirit guide, Super G.

Love, it’s an over-used word but it’s the only term I have at this point to describe what I know. I had a different definition in my mind of love previously. And that’s another shift. An enormous shift. It happens like the slow growth of blossoms on a tree in a gentle spring.

I can never remember being told I was loved as a child. Never. Until now with the help of a kind guide. Now, I know I am love, loved and loving.

With gratitude and grace, I get to integrate the healing of knowing only loving kindness from medical professionals and men. Plus it’s fun to visualize an awesome grandfather holding my hand and leading me to safety.

Thank you again. May you know and recall whatever it is that helps you through life.

i-will-hold-your-hand-lilitigercreative2

 

Love is the main ingredient

LilyTiger Holist Creative Chili Love Recipe
~ Wendy ~ Leave a comment

Chili Love Recipe
Step 1: Chop and sauté in a large fry pan on medium low heat: 1/4 stick butter until tender/ semi-transparent: 1/2 onion and 3-5 celery stalks chopped. Place onions and celery in crock pot.

Step 2: Using the same pan; brown 1 – 1.5 pounds ground turkey with salt, pepper, chili powder and red pepper flakes. Place in crock pot with above.

Step 3: Using the same pan again; sauté 1 small package of multi-colored organic carrots, chop and place in crock pot

Step 4: Add the following to the crock pot and stir:

•    1 can Hunts regular spaghetti sauce (large can)
•    1 can diced tomatoes, pureed
•    1 large jar home-canned tomatoes, pureed
•    1 can chili beans
•    1 can Northern beans, drained
•    Knorr beef stock x 4 (gel packets) (or dissolved beef bouillon)
•    3 tablespoons double roasted Trader Joe’s salsa
•    Chili powder to taste
•    Red pepper flakes to taste
•    Himalayan Pink Salt to taste
•    Fresh ground pepper to taste
And of course lots of LOVE in every step!!

Step 5: Cook in crock pot on low heat until bubbling then turn down to warm. Several hours. (ours was cooked for about 6-7 hours)

Serve with chopped sweet onions, shredded cheddar and sour cream.

Oh, and some really good  beer and corn bread  too of course 🙂

Corn bread recipe:

Step 1: Turn oven on to 325 – 345 degrees

Step 2: place 1/2 stick butter in a 9 x 9 glass baking dish and place in oven until butter melts (about 5-10 minutes – just until melted)

Step 3: Mix well in a medium mixing bowl
•    2 eggs
•    1 package Jiffy corn bread mix
•    1 small can or 1/2 large can cream corn
•    1/2 cup sour cream

Step 4: Gently pour mix into baking dish without stirring

Step 5: Bake about 20 minutes just until golden or the color you like your bread (just until done in the middle)

Serve with maple syrup or honey.

Enjoy with a wonderful group of family and friends. You won’t even notice the cold temperatures outside.

LilyTiger Holist Creative Chili Love Recipe